The Formula (No, Really) for a Successful Pitch

Today, I came across this creative note to PR professionals. If only we’d done better in Math:
Dear PR – The probability of a successful pitch can be calculated by the following handy formula applied to the details of your client’s latest wheeze.

3NT x 4UP x 2BI x 5EAI
—————————– = P(copy)
3M^3 x 2ACE x 10L

Where NT = New Technology, UP = Unique Product, BI = Beer Involved, EAI = Engineers Available for Interview, M = Marketing Managers, EMEA or Mornings, ACE = Already Covered Elsewhere (ie, your American brethren have already spilled the beans) and L = the word Leading or Leader in the first para of the press release.